"I used to snipe noble trains at 4 AM. Now I get out of breath just scrolling through my village overview."
━━━ THE TRAGIC BACKSTORY ━━━
I'm not saying the old servers gave me PTSD, but my heart still skips a beat when my microwave beeps because it sounds exactly like the incoming attack horn.
I came to this server for rehabilitation. My therapist said I needed a safe space where my capital village can't be nobled while I'm taking a shower. So here I am.
Villages currently consists of:
Component
Percentage
Troops
10%
Resources
20%
Emotional Baggage
70%
Gratitude for attack limits
100%
━━━ THE UNFAIR FIGHT CLUB ━━━
Let's be realistic. I cannot compete with the whales.
You know the type. Players who casually spend more on Tribal Wars than I spend on actual groceries.
I also don't have:
• An unlimited wallet
• A second mortgage dedicated to premium points
• Multiple people taking shifts on one account
• Someone monitoring incoming attacks while I sleep
• The mental capacity to play 24/7 anymore
So if you see my village developing at the speed of a government project, please understand. I'm doing my best.
I bring neither a whale-sized wallet nor a 5-person night shift. Just one tired player, one phone, and questionable decision-making.
━━━ MY "HEALING" DAILY ROUTINE ━━━
Time
Activity Log
03:00
Wake up in a cold sweat. Check the app. Zero incomings. Cry tears of joy. Go back to sleep.
09:00
Send my spearfighters to farm barbarians. Apologize to them for the long walk.
14:00
See a red icon. Almost throw my phone out the window. Realize it's just a quest notification.
20:00
Actually eat dinner with my family instead of hiding in the bathroom calculating return times.
23:59
Sleep like a normal human being. What a beautiful server.
━━━ DIPLOMACY & BOUNDARIES ━━━
✔ ALLIES
• Chamomile tea
• The mathematical impossibility of you nobling me
• Players who just want to build villages in peace
• Anyone who understands that real life exists
• People who don't confuse a casual server with the World Championship
NAP
• Barbarian villages near Barbarian village (314|353) K33 We have a mutual understanding. I take their clay. They take my dignity.
ENEMIES
• Anyone messaging me "u up?" at 2 AM. (No. I am sleeping. Respect my boundaries.)
• People sending 1 Ram fakes. (My nervous system is no longer built for this. Please just take the resources.)
━━━ TRAUMA RESPONSE DOCTRINE ━━━
STEP 1: See incoming attack. Experience aggressive flashbacks to 2018.
STEP 2: Draft an emotional 5-paragraph essay asking the attacker: "Who hurt you?"
STEP 3: Remember that I voluntarily transferred to a protected casual server.
STEP 4: Delete the essay.
STEP 5: Send exactly one scout back. Purely for diplomatic reasons.
STEP 6: Go water my real-life houseplants. They have needs too.
━━━ PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT ━━━
If you steal my profile picture, I won't attack you. I'll simply be deeply disappointed.
If you scout me, however, I will assume you are my sleep paralysis demon. I will then send exactly one (1) extremely slow swordsman to knock on your gates in approximately 43 hours.
Please prepare accordingly.
━━━ CURRENT OBJECTIVE ━━━
Build. Farm. Help the tribe. Don't get nobled. Have fun. Log off. Go outside. Come back tomorrow.
I am no longer here to conquer the server. I am here to survive it.
RECOVERING, NOT RETIRED. Signed by:pampreys (Currently napping. Please leave a message after the beep.)
Daily achievements
2x Attacker of the day
Defeat the most units in this world as the attacker.
Best result: on 06.08.2026 (15.630 units)
1x Defender of the day
Defeat the most units in this world as the defender.
Best result: on 11.08.2026 (23.185 units)
Combat achievements
Plunderer (Gold - Level 4)
Plunder resources from other villages 10.000 times.
Robber (Gold - Level 4)
Loot a total of 100.000.000 resources.
Death of a hero (Silver - Level 3)
While supporting other villages, lose 20.000 of your units.
Self-attack (Silver - Level 3)
Attack yourself and lose more than 1.000 units in one battle.
Successful noble claims (Silver - Level 3)
Conquer 50 claimed villages.
Conquest (Bronze - Level 2)
Conquer a total of 50 villages.
Leader (Bronze - Level 2)
Defeat a total of 100.000 enemy units.
Nobles Faith (Bronze - Level 2)
Defeat 25 noblemen in battle.
Wallbreaker (Bronze - Level 2)
Destroy 250 Wall levels using your rams.
Demolisher (Wood - Level 1)
Destroy 25 building levels using catapults.
Lucky fellow
Conquer a village by getting the loyalty down to exactly 0.
Master of the Battlefield (Wood - Level 1)
Completely destroy 25 hostile armies.
Reliable Commander (Wood - Level 1)
Support other players 50 times in battles.
Self-conquest
Conquer yourself, because that's the only way to show them who's boss.
The Warlord (Wood - Level 1)
Attack 10 different players
Unlucky fellow
Fail to conquer a village due to the loyalty only being reduced to +1.
Social achievements
Brothers in Arms (Bronze - Level 2)
Be a member of the same tribe for 60 consecutive days.
Beloved Friend (Wood - Level 1)
Make a total of 5 friendships.
Educated
Graduated from an apprenticeship under TheD0ctor.
Philanthropist (Wood - Level 1)
Gift a Premium subscription to 1 player.
Growth achievements
Band of Brothers (Gold - Level 4)
Have 10 paladins.
Librarian (Gold - Level 4)
Discover 12 unique Skill Books.
Recruitment Drive (Gold - Level 4)
Recruit a total of 1.000.000 units!
Accomplished student (Silver - Level 3)
Improve your paladins' skills to a combined total of 100 skill levels.
Architect (Silver - Level 3)
Build a total of 5.000 building levels!
Market Guru (Silver - Level 3)
Trade resources using the market 500 times.
Paladin's level (Silver - Level 3)
Level up your paladin to level 20.
Score champion (Silver - Level 3)
Climb the rankings tables and reach 100.000 points.
Wealth comes in gold (Silver - Level 3)
Mint 5.000 gold coins.
Continent scorer (Bronze - Level 2)
Make it into the top 30 of a continent!
Gatherer (Bronze - Level 2)
Scavenge a total of 10.000 resources.
Out of time (Bronze - Level 2)
Use the instant complete option 100 times!
Top scorer (Bronze - Level 2)
Make it into the top 100 in the world.
Master of Quests (Wood - Level 1)
Complete 40 quests!
Other achievements
Ancient Forge: Master Smith (Gold - Level 4)
Craft 40 items.
Ancient Forge: Collector of Recipes (Silver - Level 3)
Find 30 unique recipes.
Castle Assault: It Goes Boom!
Lead the Bombardment action gauge when it triggers.
Castle Assault: Join the fun! (Gold - Level 4)
Contribute 15.000 medals to help the tribe.
Castle Assault: Row Faster!
Lead the Naval Supply action gauge when it triggers.
Castle Assault: Siegelord (Gold - Level 4)
Participate in the destruction of 8 castles.
Seas of Fortune: Explorer (Gold - Level 4)
Explore 40 regions.
Seas of Fortune: Great Discovery (Silver - Level 3)
RECOVERING TRIBAL WARS TRYHARD 
THE TRAGIC BACKSTORY ━━━
THE UNFAIR FIGHT CLUB ━━━
An unlimited wallet
A second mortgage dedicated to premium points
Multiple people taking shifts on one account
Someone monitoring incoming attacks while I sleep
The mental capacity to play 24/7 anymore
MY "HEALING" DAILY ROUTINE ━━━
DIPLOMACY & BOUNDARIES ━━━
ENEMIES
TRAUMA RESPONSE DOCTRINE ━━━
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT ━━━
CURRENT OBJECTIVE ━━━
